laboring thoughts

unemployment sucks, big time. i was elated that finally i finished school and stuff. but i now i am not so sure. i have been getting a lot of "talks" from my parents lately. talks with the word "job" on it, insert a negative force called "pressure" and my stomache is all in knots. i dont want to be pressured but they certainly have a point in all their jabbering. now, im absolutely torn between choosing what i want (meaning be a bum for some period of time) and doing what im told to do (meaning get off my lazy ass, battle the heat and go to interviews).

i have this fear of being rejected man gud.. plus disappointments.. i have been getting a lot of them lately (disappointments bah) and feel nako nahadlok na ko madisappoint blik.. i hate the feeling.. i know i have to face the fact that not all interviews that i go to they would like me. especially if they require good scholastic records (which i dont have in my last year).

i have actually gone on 2 interviews pa...  i try to be pleasant man but i cant help it if i dont have an answer to a stupid question like "tell me something about yourself..." which by the way, i answered with all stupidity:" there is nothing much to tell.. what do you wana know..??" you should see the hiring manager's face and the look she gave me.. that's when i knew i blew it.. but to my surprise, they called the next day.. i got until to the third interview and i asked all the details about the job and the salary and the benefits.. i did not like it though and i told them "id like to give it some thought" which i think they took as a "NO". hehehe my mistake.. i shoulda taken it... but its no use crying over spilled beer.. shit happens...

now its a saturday and im postponing my job hunting escapades till next week.. seriously, i have a very bad case of "mañana habit". i just realized that now. hehehe i hope that by next week, i can definetly get off my lazy boney ass and lasso some jobs.

all this thinking about work, or my lack of work, gives me a migraine......